my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
We were destined to go to rehab together
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
