I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize
