My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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