You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
