i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
