we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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