I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
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