And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
