so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
