It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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