Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
