They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
