Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
