we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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