and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
home. puking in laundry basket.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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