At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
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