I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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