I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
