Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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