awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
