well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
