Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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