Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize