someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Lo siento on account of my penis...
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
