i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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