Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
