Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
