Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
