Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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