I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
