I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
