I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
