Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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