glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
BRING THE BAGELS
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
