We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize
