You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
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