It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
two words: eviction party
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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