Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize
