your room smells of hookers.
And success
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
