used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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