he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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