Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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