He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
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