Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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