When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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