At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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