Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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