I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
