have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
