It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize